Oh, it has been such a time of ups and downs and confusion all around! My brain overfloweth. Time has shifted into hyperdrive and every time I think I’ve got to a place where I can finally write, there goes something else and I’m blown away again.
Or perhaps I’m all sharpened up and set to go, but no internet, no cell signal, no connection to the WordPress world except perhaps the little previews from y’all that show up on the emails.
Or like the last couple of days, when my mood has been savage and it’s a wonder I’m not locked up somewhere, crazed with pain and raging against the neighbor’s stupidity for leaving their TV blasting with the door open and all I wanted was to listen to the remnants of hurricane rain pattering through the oaks. Why do people go to lovely state parks if all they want to do is watch their damn TV? They can do that at home, or at least shut their door so I don’t have to listen to it.
Yesterday the cause of my most recent volatility revealed itself: I have a viral illness. Fever, chills, sweats, aches…my eyeballs feel like they’re trying to explode. What a mess that would be, but since I’d be blind, I wouldn’t see it. My head feels like Rocky’s punching bag.
Funny thing is, I still have an appetite. Strange. In fact, I find myself actually cooking. Unusual, for me.
And I don’t want any cannabis, which is downright odd.
But before this all came into consciousness, that I am sick, I went to the health food store and stocked up on my winter supplements, the ones I use on a daily basis so as not to get sick, and the ones to abort sickness at the first signs.
So, as soon as I realized my present state of illness, I began gobbling Chinese herbs and homeopathic remedies. Better late than never, I suppose. I’m hoping it will ward off the usual case of pneumonia that follows any sort of respiratory badness, since I have shit for lungs.
I was to have gone to visit my mother tomorrow. That was my plan, until the fever, etc, hit. But she is almost 90 and I don’t want to expose her to my germs, so I had to call that off. I admit to feeling guilty, since I really didn’t want to see her in the first place, but I had every intention of doing so. When I called to let her know I wouldn’t be coming, she didn’t sound too disappointed. She also didn’t sound too disappointed that yet another of her cats has disappeared (this must be #7 or 8, minimum). Oh well, plenty more cats at the shelter. And plenty of coyotes that also have to eat!
I have settled in at an “old friend” campground, where I hope to rest and recover and finally write for you the story of the events of the past month, more or less, and I hope that as I write, things will untangle and perhaps I will feel less confused.
Hasta mañana, hasty potato…