So my very good friend met this guy, and he thought that this guy and I might like to be in touch, because this guy and I have some things in common, and all this and that.
So I said fine, tell him he can call me, but if you think you’re matchmaking, well, don’t. He said he didn’t. Emphatically.
The guy calls. He seems nice. He seems interesting. We do have stuff in common, and we jabber away for a couple of hours.
Now, this guy doesn’t use computers. He has a smartphone, but no idea how to use it. So no exchanges of ideas beyond voice calling. And he lives far away. And although he has a camper, he’s not so much into traveling.
Fine, no problem. I’m not in the market. I can’t even have sex due to the physical ravages of chronic illness, so even considering a regular relationship is silly. Thankfully, my sex drive drove off without me some years back, so it’s just not an issue. And even more thankfully, I’m not lonely. The opposite: I can’t stand people in my space for long periods of time. Like, for instance, five minutes would be too long. I would like to have a friend who actually wants to know me, not a lover who only wants to know my booty.
So a few days ago we have our third phone conversation.
He gets right down to it:
“Where do we stand? I need to know.”
I explained to him all of the above. I told him that I’m totally up for meetings along the trail, circling up of wagons (Wild West reference, for you who were not raised on Spaghetti Westerns), serenading the coyotes, and other friendly activities.
Just. Not. Sex. OK?
Judging by his chilly tone of voice, it seemed probable that it was not OK.
You know what?
I don’t give a shit.
annesspirit
/ July 29, 2016You are a very cool girl. Not to worry. Sorry you wasted your precious time.
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ July 29, 2016😀 Right????
G. Collerone
/ July 29, 2016Wow, what an ass. Though I got the same from my ex after not seeing her for 10 years.
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ July 29, 2016Eh. Boys, girls, they’re all after the same thing 😂
CC
/ July 29, 2016“I would like to have a friend who actually wants to know me, not a lover who only wants to know my booty.” – Favorite quotes by Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
Love it! Ummm.. where do I find one of those..is there a directory? Sign me up. 😉 -CC
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ July 29, 2016Hahaha, ummm….no. If I run across one, I’ll for sure sign you up, but so far, no.
Oliana
/ July 29, 2016Aw frigg, his loss…a good companionship goes a long way years after the sex stops. Pooh on him for being an idiot. I gave up on idiots because I love my space way too much and love myself just as much 🙂
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ July 30, 2016It gets to a point where enjoying the life one has is not contingent upon others. For me, this is phenomenal. This poor fellow was nothing but a blip on my radar.
Oliana
/ July 30, 2016Can’t even hear the blip 😉
sheldonk2014
/ July 29, 2016without getting to know you
I can’t see how it was a lose or a gain
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ July 30, 2016His loss!
ashualec
/ July 30, 2016Laura,
The best part is that you are not lonely even when you stay alone. You cannot know what a great blessing it is.
Love and light
Ashu
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ July 30, 2016Oh, I do know! Time was when being alone was like burning in boiling oil. Now it’s just nice and peaceful. Ahhh…..
1jaded1
/ July 30, 2016Spews angry eye his way.
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ July 30, 2016Uh oh! I bet he feels like he stepped on a fire ants’ nest LOL. Poor schmuck
1jaded1
/ July 30, 2016LOL @ fire ants. They would work better.
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ July 30, 2016😂
painkills2
/ July 30, 2016I’ve been meaning to do a post about the men I’ve met through the internet. (Hey, that rhymes.) But really, it’s the same story — if you’re not interested in dating (sex), then men aren’t interested in you. I guess men don’t value friendship like women do. (My god, that rhymes, too. Must be the weed.) 🙂
And even when you tell a dude up front that sex is off the table, they keep asking. And they’re pushy about it. Thing is, women have to be careful not to piss off these dudes. So many of them have guns. I’ve been lucky so far, only having to deal with verbal abuse through email. But no man is worth these kinds of risks. Their loss. 🙂
I’m gonna wait for Bradley Cooper to notice me. Since that will never happen, I’m glad I know how to take care of myself. 😀
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ July 30, 2016Hahaha I just about peed my pants laughing. Did you happen to get the brownie I sent you? OK yeah I sent it by carrier pigeon….those dudes do love brownies….oh! There it is! Flying around in circles, tweeting “Yellow Submarine!” Damn, I was going to use FedEx but thought the pigeon would be more discreet….
Oh yeah. Men. Guns???? Good grief, it’s a good thing I don’t get out much.
Kitt O'Malley
/ July 31, 2016He sounds like an ass. I love that you don’t give a shit.
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ July 31, 2016😀 Me too!
faithhopechocolate
/ September 26, 2016What an a-hole. Praise be for not giving a sh–
Laura P. Schulman, MD, MA
/ September 26, 2016Indeed! 😄