Why I have not been posting lately

It seems forever since I have sat down to write a real post.   There are several reasons for this.  One, which comes in the easily solvable excuse category, is that my internet access has been lousy.  OK, so I could write them up in a word processing program and go somewhere with internet and publish them.  That would work if I was the type of person who left the house on a regular basis.  I am not that type of person. 

The second reason is that my emotional life has been taken up with helping my parents in various ways.  This is a good thing.  It is what I am here to do.  But it is absolutely draining in every imaginable way. 

The third reason is that I have been slogging through a bout of bipolar depression, which has everything stuck like the Laguna Tar Pits.  I know precisely how those dinosaurs felt when it happened.  “Hey Joe, how come I can’t move?”  “Because you’re stuck, is why.”

Called my shrink.  More Lamectil, he said.  Oh great, that usually sends me into a horrid mixed state, then I have to take enough Seroquel to send me to bed for three or for days.  I don’t have time for this.  Can’t be helped, he says.  That’s what works for you.  Shit.  I’m just not up for it this time.  But no choice.

At least I have little Noga snuggled up next to me.   I can dimly feel her through the depressive haze.  I know she’s here, though, and that gives me a lot of comfort.

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This is Noga, my psychiatric service dog.

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7 Comments

  1. Sending good thoughts your way. And give Noga a snuggle for me 🙂

    Reply
  2. Noga is such a sweetheart. Tell her Ruby says to take extra-specially good care of you right now, and give you lots of love! Ruby sends you lots of love, too. ❤

    Reply
  3. Those are all things I would categorize as “not excuses” myself. Perfectly valid reasons for being quiet.

    What a lovely dog! Ours is rambunctious and not particularly obedient, but sweet and devoted.

    Reply
    • Thanks. I really need validation for just “being.” As a fellow over-achiever, I suspect you know what I mean. Is your dog also an Apso?

      Reply
      • Yeah, I have a hard time cutting myself any slack, even when I know I should. I suppose it’s partly an acceptance thing and partly an ambition thing. Who knows?

        Our dog is a pound puppy – a mutt of some kind. She’s part chow-chow and probably collie (maybe husky?). She has a purple tongue and curling tail with a beautiful thick red and white coat that is soft and not stinky. And a very expressive doggy face. 🙂

        Reply

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